THE PARENTING GUIDE : CHAPTER 3
What Makes Children Misbehave?
Misbehavior can be a reaction to food, environment, miscommunication, need for attention, need for freedom or household changes. Careful observation can help determine which area may be causing children to act out, in order to better assist them through their struggles.
Unearthing The Root Cause Of Children’s Misbehavior
Getting to the root cause of misbehavior can be tricky, with limited communication, children of a very young age don’t have the understanding, nor the vocabulary, to express their feelings. Crying or cranky behavior can be a symptom of a food allergy, but the child has no way of explaining how he or she feels and can only react to the discomfort.
CAUSES FOR CHILD MISBEHAVIOR
SIX REASONS WHY
CAUSE FOR CHILD MISBEHAVIOR # 1
DIETS & FOOD SENSITIVITIES
MOODS MAY BE CAUSED BY FOODS
Everything we eat affects the chemistry of our bodies. To a certain degree, most of what we eat is toxic. It is how our bodies deal with those toxins that determines whether we can eat it or not. Some of the effects of those toxins can manifest as skin rashes, inflammation, digestion problems or a low immune system; and some can even lead to long-term health problems.
While some effects are visible, others are not. But most of the symptoms of food intoxication affect mood. Like trying to smile while wearing really tight shoes, children suffering from the effects of food sensitivities may display a wide array of behaviors; from hyperactivity and irritability to discomfort that leads children to seek more sedate activities. These behaviors can manifest following eating patterns, but they may not always be immediate nor obvious.
A recent awareness of the effects of gluten is focusing a bright light on its short and long-term effects. Being linked to a myriad of diseases, from Irritable Bowl Syndrome to Autism, gluten is quickly climbing the charts to become the first toxin you should eradicate from your family’s diet.
Since each child has a unique chemistry, consulting a nutritionist is recommended when suspicion of food sensitivities arise. Early detection will help prevent long-term damage and suffering.
GOOD PUPPY Child Cognitive Behavioral Tools aid in communication, helping parents better understand their children’s needs. Learning to recognize and verbalize emotions liberates children from having to act them out. Moodiness and reactions to toxins are easier to recognize in children with a healthy and solid structure and consistent good behavior.
CAUSE FOR CHILD MISBEHAVIOR # 2
ENVIRONMENT
THE CONSTANT CONDITIONER
What we take for granted is usually what affects us most. From the pretty tree in the front yard that unknowingly causes us to sneeze three months a year, to a messy room that installs subconscious chaos and a messy internal structure.
How Children Incorporate Their Environment
That which immediately surrounds us is the world we live in. We accept this world for what it is and we don’t question it. Think of it as the energy we breathe. It comes into our bodies through all our senses. Our surrounding becomes a part of us. It helps us define ourselves, determine our own value and create our own limitations.
Where we come from is where we imagined our future from, it is our reality, from which we build an image of where we can go in life. To program ourselves for success, we need an orderly structure that can support success.
Daring imaginations coupled with a clear and organized vision, have broken down many walls, both social and self-imposed. In following their dreams and finding their purpose in life, many have risen in consciousness to let their spirits sore.
A well-structured and nurturing environment is fundamental for healthy child development. Confidence and a well nourished imagination will give a child wings.
Use your GOOD PUPPY Child Behavioral Tools to build af a happy, positive and cooperative environment and prepare children for an awesome flight.
CAUSE FOR CHILD MISBEHAVIOR # 3
MISCOMMUNICATION
HITTING THE INVISIBLE WALL
The general belief about communication is that people understand what we’re saying, but usually, nothing could be further from the truth. Miscommunication easily emerges from different languages, social or economic backgrounds, religious beliefs, upbringing, personality types, I.Q., emotional intelligence, personal preferences, expectations or simply age gaps.
More Than Words Can Say
The way we deliver our messages can have more weight in defining what is understood, than what we are actually saying. Whether we look into someone’s eyes or scream across the room, whether we say something with love and patience or with neglect and disdain, will affect the message received.
Young children read more into gestures and tones than the vocabulary used. While words have recent and little meaning to them, they have more experience at picking up on the energy directed at them and the tones used. So, while there may have been nothing wrong with what was said, the way it was said can change the final interpretation with damaging consequences to communication, behavior and family dynamics.
The GOOD PUPPY Child Behavioral System promotes communication and serves as a translator for parents and children alike. Through multiple correspondences and empathetic images, children are met at a level they can manage, master and quickly learn from.
CAUSE FOR CHILD MISBEHAVIOR # 4
NEGATIVE ATTENTION SEEKING
REALLY? IS THAT WHAT CHILDREN WANT?
Only miscommunication can lead us into negative attention. No child wants to be yelled at, mistreated, or punished. The claim that children seek negative attention doesn’t quite add up. Children need attention. It is somewhere between how they seek it and how responsive parents are, that brings negative attention into play.
They Just Want Attention
Children ask for attention when they need it, which may not always be the most convenient time. Helping them deal with delaying the fulfillment of this need can be seriously challenging. Especially with extroverted personalities whose humors and sometimes self-esteem, are dependent on immediate gratification. This is usually when children’s insistence and steadfast persistence, is perceived as “negative attention seeking.” The child is still just asking for attention, It is the parent, well past irritated, that can only afford to provide negative attention.
The GOOD PUPPY Behavioral System is designed to get children attention for positive accomplishments and good behavior that otherwise would go unnoticed. Parents can easily apply motivational tools, create incentives and rewards and assist children at delaying gratification in a playful manner, allowing them to give children the best and most nurturing of their attention.
CAUSE FOR CHILD MISBEHAVIOR # 5
FREEDOM
BUILDING STEPPING STONE CHALLENGES
Granting children the chances to assume new tasks is an important part of early development. But those new freedoms need to be earned for many reasons. Children left to perform tasks they’re not ready for, will not benefit from the experience and may be reluctant to try again.
One Step At A Time
Children handle failure in different ways. While some may not seem to be affected by it, others may be traumatized by the negative outcome. These children may rebel when faced with having to assume responsibility for something that has been done for them until then.
Easing children into new tasks and letting them gain control of the situation, assures them that they can confidently assume responsibility for it. This learning process and positive outcomes build self-esteem and motivate children to attempt to master new challenges on their own.
GOOD PUPPY Child Cognitive Behavioral Tools engage children in learning and growing, while getting them the recognition they need in order to build confidence. That confidence grows their self-esteem, which allows them to deal with failures with the desire to try again. Cause and effect teach children to consider consequences when making choices, making them critical thinkers. As children gain freedoms, belief in themselves and critical thinking will predispose them to succeed at whatever tickles their fancy.
CAUSE FOR CHILD MISBEHAVIOR # 6
HOUSEHOLD CHANGES
WHO MOVED THE WALLS?
Any changes in the home may reflect in behavior changes, from a divorce to a permissive aunt visiting for the week. Children can feel stress levels in their parents. They hear it in conversation, notice changes such as less patience and higher irritability. Sometimes, a bad week for the couple or dad falling asleep on the couch can fill the child’s imagination with fears of divorce, a broken home structure, losing a parent’s love or even guilt.
Fixing A Shaken Structure
Children may not know how to talk about what’s bothering them, but they will react from a new, unstable position. Anger may manifest itself as a result of these fears or unresolved worries. Misbehavior can be a symptom of emotional distress over changes in the home.
Getting children to communicate, requires trust. Bonding, listening and giving children the tools to help them identify and verbalize their emotions, within a safe and playful environment, will aid in communication.
GOOD PUPPY Child Behavioral Emotional Tools aid children at identifying and verbalizing emotions. This allows parents to better communicate to clear misunderstandings and guide children away from negative thoughts and emotions.
PARENTING RECOMMENDATION
SMART TOYS
ADDRESS BEHAVIOR EVEN BEFORE IT BECOMES A PROBLEM
Children learn best playing, so why not give them the toys to help them learn what will empower them. Children are like sponges, they quickly absorb information. So, let’s make that information as useful as possible.
Implement the GOOD PUPPY Child Behavioral System and give children the tools, structure, experience and information they need to think critically, to understand emotions, to improve communication, to cope with early learning challenges and build a healthy code of ethics.
It’s simple, pick the toolkit that best fits your situation, such as the HOME Super Sidekick for parents, also available in PDF, and follow the simple instructions in the order they are presented. You may choose to implement a section a week, or follow your child’s pace. By the third of the ten total sections, family dynamics should have vastly improved.
If you feel that you need help, you may choose to get some coaching. But if you just have questions, you can always contact Roger. Your Super Sidekick is always at your service!
TEACHER, PARENT OR THERAPIST?
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Choose The Tools That Best Fit Your Needs
Curated for Home, School and Therapy, the system is designed to meet parents or guardians needs with HOME, teachers and counselors needs with SCHOOL, and social workers and therapist’s needs with THERAPY. Coaches are encouraged to use the HOME tools for parent’s easiest implementation.
Gabriel Tito, MS
Child & Family Therapy
GOOD PUPPY Child Cognitive Behavioral System Collaborator, Consultant, Implementer & Master Coach
Drums & Percussion Therapist
In his fifteen years working with children, ages 3 to 18, Gabriel noticed a lack of tools to implement changes in family dynamics, prompting the creation and his collaboration on the GOOD PUPPY Child Cognitive Behavioral System. You can find Gabriel in South Florida, making families happy with quick and effective results, or online, looking to share his toys and everything he’s learned.
What Does It Take To Do A Good Parenting Job?
Just like any job, raising children comes with a list of requirements. These requirements allow for a positive parenting experience, beneficial to everyone. But while anyone may muster up some of these traits, it is mastering them that will turn them into parenting super powers.